Re:Focus

The Low Road

The Low Road   a poem by Marge Piercy

What can they do
to you? Whatever they want.
They can set you up, they can
bust you, they can break
your fingers, they can
burn your brain with electricity,
blur you with drugs till you
can t walk, can’t remember, they can
take your child, wall up
your lover. They can do anything
you can’t blame them
from doing. How can you stop
them? Alone, you can fight,
you can refuse, you can
take what revenge you can
but they roll over you.

But two people fighting
back to back can cut through
a mob, a snake-dancing file
can break a cordon, an army
can meet an army.

Two people can keep each other
sane, can give support, conviction,
love, massage, hope, sex.
Three people are a delegation,
a committee, a wedge. With four
you can play bridge and start
an organisation. With six
you can rent a whole house,
eat pie for dinner with no
seconds, and hold a fund raising party.
A dozen make a demonstration.
A hundred fill a hall.
A thousand have solidarity and your own newsletter;
ten thousand, power and your own paper;
a hundred thousand, your own media;
ten million, your own country.

It goes on one at a time,
it starts when you care
to act, it starts when you do
it again after they said no,
it starts when you say We
and know who you mean, and each
day you mean one more.

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Why You Shouldn’t Hire An Ostrich To Do Customer Service

When an ostrich feels threatened it buries its head in the sand. The ostrich believes, so the theory goes, that if it can’t see you, then you don’t exist.  Danger averted. This is one of the primary reasons we don’t hire ostriches for customer service jobs.  Simply ignoring a customer will not alleviate their problem nor will it make them go away.  It may come as a surprise then how many customer service professionals seem to have been trained by ostriches.

Just a few days ago, I walked up to a counter at the airport to ask the gate agent a quick and simple question.  I saw she was on the phone as I approached and expected to wait a minute or two.  As she saw me approach she averted her eyes down and away.  I stood and waited patiently. 

Standing right next to her, I could hear her call. It was about something work related but it included a lot of he-said-she-said also.  I only had a quick question; she wouldn’t even need to look anything up on her computer or even end her conversation.  I politely interrupted, “I’m sorry, can you tell me where the B terminal is please?” Instead of asking whoever was on the other end of the line to hold on a second so she could quickly answer my question, she actually turned away from me even more, not even acknowledging that I existed.  Like an ostrich, she thought that if she couldn’t see me, then I don’t exist or at least I’d go away.

I didn’t go away.  Instead, I seethed.

I tend not to be the seething sort, so it fascinated me why I seethed.  Was it because I want all the attention and I expect to be listened to and heard on my terms, when I wanted it, especially by someone who is supposed to be in a customer service role?

I could have easily walked away and asked someone else.  I probably could have found a sign if I looked around a little more.  Damn her, she’s a customer service agent and I’m a customer!

Nope. It was none of those things.

A few days later, I was in a hotel and wanted to know which way the conference center was.  Again, a simple question that wouldn’t require anyone to do any work, look anything up on a computer or even stop what they were doing.  Just like a few days before, I approached the concierge counter and the concierge was on the phone.  Like a few days before, she was talking about something work related but there was clearly a little extra friendly banter.  Like a few days before, she didn’t interrupt her call to help me. She continued to talk on the phone leaving me standing there to wait for her.  But she did one simple thing completely different.  She looked over the phone, held up her finger and mouthed the words, “I’ll be right with you…”

I didn’t go away this time either…but this time, I felt fine.

No seething.  No anger. No incensed customer demanding immediate attention.

So often, companies forget that 100% of customers are people. And people are human.  And humans are a sensitive sort.  A delicate mix of caffeine, sleep-deprivation, hormones, uncertainty, social awkwardness, stubbornness and a dash of the-world-revolves-around-me-because-I’m-the-customer. Though we think we want answers and immediate attention, in reality we just want to be acknowledged.  We just want someone to show us, in some way, that they recognize that we exist. If we don’t get that, we demand even more than we really need and act like a buffoon until we do.  In contrast, if our existence is acknowledged, we show remarkable patience and generosity.

More than one of my friends have complained to me that when they come over to my apartment, I just scream out come in. They will walk in while I’m finishing an email and, without looking up, I’ll just shout out, “hey.”  The first time I heard the complaint I pushed back, “I’ve known you for years, you’ve been here thousands of times, just give me a minute and I’ll give you all my attention.”  Then I added the kicker, “why so selfish?”  But my friends are human (for the most part) and are, like me, a sensitive lot. So after more than one person told me it was rude, I tried taking my head out of the ground.

Now, when my friends come over, I hear the same knock and, even if the door is unlocked, I get up and let them in.  “Hey,” I say, “come in, I’m just finishing an email, give me a minute and I’ll be right with you.”  They say, “don’t worry, take as long as you want.”  I get more time to finish what I need to and no one feels uncomfortable. 

Perhaps we should change the term "customer service representative" to "people service representative" just to remind everyone that customers are people too.

p.s. no need to send me an email telling me that ostriches don't actually bury their heads in the sand. I know they don't.  But that doesn't change the fact that too many customer service representatives do.

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Why Better Is Better Than Best

The fastest runners in the world run between 12-14mph (19-23kph). The average bear runs between 30-40mph (48-64kph).  That means if a bear decides to give chase, even Usain Bolt, the world record sprinter, could not outrun it.

But there is an adage: to get away from a bear you don't have to be the fastest runner in the world, you just have to be faster than the guy behind you.  

The same is true in business. 

It is amazing how many businesses, big and small, like to present themselves as "the best." I once met an optometrist, for example, who bragged to me that her store had "the best service in the industry." A claim that is simply untrue - or at least there is no way to actually measure if it even if it is true.  At the end of the day, there is no way for any business to say they offer the best of anything - service, quality or features. There are no standard metrics and most companies have no idea who all their competitors are. 

The good news is, you don't need to be the best. You need to be better.  "The best" is an impossible standard that lacks credibility. But "better" is a realistic claim and a much easier comparison to make. The optometrist I met should have told me that she was "driven to offer better service than any of the other stores in the area and, more importantly, to outdo her own great service every year." To her this seemingly lower claim is actually much more realistic, much more believable and much more appealing.

The standard of "better" also keeps you on your toes. Like being chased by a bear, you always have to be one step ahead not to get eaten. Thinking you're better means you have to keep pushing, learning and improving because there is still room for improvement (not to mention there is a huge bear running behind you). Being the best offers only a short-term advantage.

  Once you're the best, there is no incentive to push any harder and laziness or hubris start to set in (think about any big company that made it to the top of their industry only to be bashed from all sides by every competitor...bashed by everyone working to be better). And for all those "bests" out there who believe their incentive is to stay the best, they are fooling themselves. Just as there is much more of an incentive to lose a few pounds than to stay the same weight, just as there is much more of an incentive to run your next race faster than to  run it at the same pace, the incentive to improve is always more powerful than the false incentive to stay in one place, even if it's the best.

Any great athlete, company or leader that is actually capable of staying ahead of the pack for any significant period of time is able to do so not because they think they are the best, but because they show up every day to do better than their most important competitor of all: themselves.

Pushing yourself and those around you to be the best is unsustainable. Pushing yourself and those around you to be better is the only way to best the best...and outrun the bear.

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Ready. Aim. Miss!

What do you think you can achieve this year? Make that your target and pursue it. 

This is what most people and companies do. "Our target is 30," they say, and they get really excited when they hit 29.  Or SUPER excited when they hit 31.  Just look at Wall Street predictions, as an example. Always remarkably accurate...or perhaps their goals are just too small.

The problem in the world is that life is about managing expectations. If we over promise and miss our target, others will say we failed. If we under promise and exceed our predictions, others will hail us as geniuses.  The question is, do you want be a hailed as a genius or do you want to actually advance something in the world?

You can feel happy and take steps with achievable goals, but progress and innovation only happen with unrealistic goals. It is the entrepreneurs and the innovators in the world who consistently set unrealistic goals.  "We're going to hit 100," they say, and are really disappointed when they only hit 80.

Any great and inspiring leader or organization that ever lived set out to do something completely unrealistic.  Most of them probably never achieved what they set out to. And most of them also probably achieved more than anyone else thought possible.

Realistic goals will give you the feeling you've done something remarkable, but only unrealistic goals will ensure you actually do.

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What Can Be Gained From This Decision?

I got an email from an old friend.  Well...I say friend, but in reality I haven't had any contact with her for over two years.  Over the years, I have reached out and tried to make contact, but never received a reply.  She wasn't close enough that I would go through any emotional trauma...so my life progressed without her in it.

Then, on Sunday night, quite out of the blue, I received an email from her.  "Hey Simon," began the email, "we haven't spoken in a while.  Congrats again on your book last year."  Then the email launches straight into what read like a copy-and-paste job from some form letter.  She wanted my help to vote for something she's doing and tell people about it on my blog. 

I found it remarkable that someone who has basically ignored me for a long time had the audacity to email me, offer some fake congratulations for something I did 10 months ago then immediately ask for something. 

In my mind, I started to pen my reply.

Option 1 - Sarcasm: 

Dear X,

So good to hear from you.  It has been a while since last we talked.  I think that's because you stopped returning my calls or emails.  But now that you've emailed me out of the blue when you need something, I'd be glad to help.  You can count on my vote.

- Simon

Option 2 - Honesty: 

Dear X,

What a surprise. I never thought I'd ever hear from you again. If I'm honest, I'm a little taken aback how you all but ignore me for two years then email me only when you need something.  Under different circumstances, I would have been happy to support you, but given these circumstances, I feel quite uncomfortable doing so and won't be voting for you or lending any support.  I wish you luck and perhaps our paths will cross again under nicer conditions,

- Simon

Option 3 - To the point:

Dear X,

No. 

- Simon

Which to send, which to send, which to send?

To help me decide, I applied a little test.  Whenever there is a hard decision, especially one that involves emotions, I ask myself, "what can be gained from this decision?" And the answer was, for all the options: nothing. If I sent a reply of any sorts, all I would be doing is satisfying my own ego and getting in a jab or a last word. At best, I wouldn't get a reply from her and at worst I'd unleash a potentially bloody battle.  In other words - there was nothing to be gained from sending any reply.  And so I sent nothing.

So often we're faced with decisions that are almost completely emotional. The impact can sometimes agitate a neutral situation or exacerbate an already bad one. The decisions we make should have a positive impact on us, our lives, our jobs, the people around us and even our competitors or opponents. If nothing can be gained by a decision, then that decision should be left alone...which can achieve the greatest gain of all: peace of mind.

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Movement

On August 28, 1963, 250,000 people from across the country descended on the Mall in Washington, D.C., to hear Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. give his famous “I Have a Dream” speech. The organizers didn’t send out 250,000 invitations and there was no Web site to check the date. How did they get a quarter of a million people to show up on the right day at the right time?

Dr. King was not the only person alive during that time who knew what had to change to bring about civil rights in America. He had many ideas about what needed to happen, but so did others. And not all of his ideas were good. He was not a perfect man; he had his complexities.

But Dr. King was absolute in his conviction. He knew change had to happen in America. His clarity of WHY, his sense of purpose, gave him the strength and energy to continue his fight against often seemingly insurmountable odds. There were others like him who shared his vision of America, but many of them gave up after too many defeats. Defeat is painful. And the ability to continue head-on, day after day, takes something more than knowing what legislation needs to be passed. For civil rights to truly take hold in the country, its organizers had to rally everyone. They may have been able to pass legislation, but they needed more than that, they needed to change a country. Only if they could rally a nation to join the cause, not because they had to, but because they wanted to, could any significant change endure. But no one person can effect lasting change alone. It would take others who believed what King believed.

The details of how to achieve civil rights or what needed to be done were debatable, and different groups tried different strategies. Violence was employed by some, appeasement by others. Regardless of how or what was being done, there was one thing everyone had in common—WHY they were doing it. It was not just Martin Luther King’s unflappable conviction that was able to stir a population, but his ability to put his WHY into words. Dr. King had a gift. He talked about what he believed. And his words had the power to inspire:

“I believe.”

“I believe.”

“I believe.”

People heard his beliefs and his words touched them deep inside. Those who believed what he believed took that cause and made it their own. And they told people what they believed. And those people told others what they believed. Some organized to get that belief out more efficiently.

And in the summer of 1963, a quarter of a million people showed up to hear Dr. King deliver his “I Have a Dream” speech on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial.

But how many people showed up for Dr. King?

Zero.

They showed up for themselves. It was what they believed. It was what they saw as an opportunity to help America become a better version of itself. It was they who wanted to live in a country that reflected their own values and beliefs that inspired them to get on a bus to travel for eight hours to stand in the Washington sun in the middle of August to hear Dr. King speak. Being in Washington was simply one of the things they did to prove what they believed. Showing up that day was one of the WHATs to their own WHY. This was a cause and it was their cause.

*   *   *

I have been inspired by Martin Luther King and how he inspired a movement.  I have learned that a cause must be organic; if it is to have an impact it must belong to those who join the movement and not those who lead it.

Not too long ago, a student at TCU in Texas named Katie Jones started posting comments on my blog and Facebook fan page. She would often share her thoughts and offer some inspiring words. She also showed up on one of my left-sider's conference calls, where she shared her vision of the world.  Though I have never met Katie in person, I have come to appreciate her energy and her belief in the movement to inspire people to do the things that inspire them...to help reverse the statistic that 80% of people don't love what they do...to create a world in which the vast majority of people wake up everyday inspired.

And then it happened. 

Katie has taken this cause and made it her own. She started a website called liveyourwhy.com to collect stories of people who have found their Why.  Her aim is to inspire others to find and live their Why by sharing the stories of those who do.  I plan on sharing a story with her and I encourage you to also.  The more we help Katie, the more people she will inspire to find their Why.  And the more people she inspires, the more people take the cause and make it their own.  And the movement will grow and grow...and together we will change the world.

Thank you Katie...you inspire me.

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